Love is a Drag: Colonial Theater Boys Serve It!

Sean Koepfinger, Assistant A&E Editor

You might be avoiding meat today, but the Colonial Theater certainly wasn’t serving fish last night (drag queens that look like real women).  Seven boys including two RMU ulums pulled out stilettos and falsettos for their performance of “Love is a Drag 3: Untucked.”  This is the third time the Colonial Theater has performed their drag show, which is held every other year.

Michael Goffus, Tanner Sebastian, Spencer Thurman, Patrick Hanlon, Aaron Cook, Clay Glenny and Robert Kowalewski became the lovely ladies Adele Dazeem, Hernia Swanson, Camille Towe, Lexi Disa, Anita Dickerson, Ophelia Bottoms and Mia Diction respectively. Lead by Ryan Wagner, these girls sashayed across the stage doing performances of their favorite musical numbers to raise money for the Animal Rescue League Shelter.

To start off the night, Ryan Wagner introduced our seven stunning sisters with a group performance of Cabaret’s “Willkommen.”  Mia Diction, dressed as a nun, warmed up the stage with a rendition of “Climb Every Mountain” from the Sound of Music.  This was followed by Camille Towe’s solo of “Fight for Me” while Lexi Disa confessed her basic white girl love with “Taylor the Latte Boy.”  With so many fabulous queens lighting the stage on fire, Hernia Swanson decided to cool it down with an excellent performance of “Let it Go” with some wonderful ad lib to catch a mistake: “You’ll never see my cry! (Over forgotten words).”

In between musical numbers, the queens showed off some of their acting abilities with a dating game sketch laced with sexual innuendos as a male member of the audience tried to choose which gorgeous gal he wanted to take home with him.  By the end of the game all he had to say was, “Do I have to pick one?”

After another group performance of Chicago’s “All that Jazz,” Mia Diction returned to the stage to perform the duet “Bosom Buddies” with Ophelia Bottoms.  Anita Dickerson sashayed on stage in what was easily the most gorgeous dress of the night to sing “Out Here on my Own.”  After Anita’s fierce performance, Ophelia returned to perform “Poor Unfortunate Souls” from The Little Mermaid with Ryan donning a red wig to fill the role of Ariel.  Wrapping up the night was the green-mugged Adele Dazeem serving it with her rendition of “Defying Gravity” from Wicked.  All seven girls returned for one final number to remind the audience that “We are what we are.”

While these queens may not have been fishy, they beat their faces with the campiest drag they could and proved that they could work it just as well as the ladies.  Condragulations girls, you killed it out there.

Left to Right:  Michael Goffus as Adele Dazeem, Aaron Cook as Anita Dickerson, Robert Kowaleski as Mia Diction, Patrick Hanolon as Lexi Disa, Ryan Wagner, Tanner Sebastian as Hernia Swanson, Spencer Thurman as Camille Towe, and Clay Glenny as Ophelia Bottoms
Sean Koepfinger
Left to Right: Michael Goffus as Adele Dazeem, Aaron Cook as Anita Dickerson, Robert Kowaleski as Mia Diction, Patrick Hanolon as Lexi Disa, Ryan Wagner, Tanner Sebastian as Hernia Swanson, Spencer Thurman as Camille Towe, and Clay Glenny as Ophelia Bottoms